Doused In Bleach
by bleachfanficfanatic
Summary: Author's Note: Inspired by Fungus Witch I tried my hand at a reader POVs. Isolated one shots, not related, just put in one place for easy posting and reading. Various pairings (Reader X Characters). So far, only Renji (because yum).
1. Renji - Doused in Bleach

**Scenario: What if one day you woke up to find yourself in the world of Bleach in the sixth division with no knowledge of how you got there or how to get back out?**

* * *

 **Doused in Bleach**

 _By: bleachfanficfanatic_

Sighing you step outside onto the terrace. The night sky is clear and the breeze chilly but you welcome it. The heat inside is just too much. That or perhaps it's having had to endure the intense stare of a certain red headed shinigami. You sigh again, thinking back over the months you've been here, hiding in plain sight and trying to survive. Because you don't belong here, not really. You're not even sure how you _got_ here but you know you have to get back.

You feel his eyes again, staring at your back but before he can make his way to you a gentler and less oppressive figure steps up next to you.

"Are you ok _-chan?" Inoue-san asks you.

You turn and give her a small smile but you know she isn't fooled. Inoue-san sees and understands more than anyone gives her credit for.

"Hai, Inoue-san, just…tired I guess. It's been a long day." You take another deep breath and push away from the balcony. "I think I'm going to head back, it was good to see you and Kurosaki-san again." You smile for real this time; you love seeing these two so happy, finally together after everything they've been through.

She gives your hand a reassuring squeeze reminding you she's there to talk if you want. You're amazed at how welcoming and warm almost everyone has been since you got here. For the most part, they've respected your privacy, interpreting your reticence as either shyness or the result of significant trauma, which you know they know all too well. They just don't know that you know way more than you should.

Because you're really not from around here. _They_ aren't even supposed to be real. As you walk through the hall towards the main doors you think back to your first day here. The first day you woke up in the anime Bleach.

 _You should have known something was wrong the moment you woke up. You just didn't feel…right. Stretching taught muscles your eyes opened and immediately you sucked in a deep breath. "Where the hell am I?" Looking at your surroundings you'd been startled to see plain wood walls and feel a decidedly uncomfortable futon mattress beneath your butt. Lifting your hand you'd almost screamed…you…you were animated!_

 _Tearing out of the room your eyes widened further. You recognized this place, knew it as much as the back of your hand considering how much time you'd spent watching anime. You were in Soul Society. You were a soul! Not just a soul, but a death god, or at least one in training. Overwhelmed you ran like a freaking idiot only to collide with something hard._

" _Watch the fuck where you're going!" a rough voice had said and you'd frozen on the ground._

 _Slowly your eyes trailed up landing on the face of the annoyed male towering over you. Abarai Renji, lieutenant of the sixth division. You just crashed into…Abarai-fukutaichou!_

 _As if the whole situation couldn't have gotten any worse the first words out of your mouth were, "Am I dead?"_

 _He'd looked at you like you were crazy and at that moment you'd felt you were. It was all just too bizarre. A beat of silence passed before he reached down and hauled you to your feet effortlessly. "Be a little more careful next time," he admonished a bit softer in tone and then left you standing gaping like a fish._

Your memories move in succession over the last few months. Somehow you and Renji always seemed to be running into each other. Eventually he began teasing that you were stalking him. You insisted that wasn't the case. In your own mind you knew, if anything, you'd been trying to avoid him. You'd been trying to find a way back home but nothing was working.

"Come out for a drink with us _-chan," Renji had said one night standing with Ikkaku, Yumichika and Rangiku. Despite your protests the three shinigami easily dragged you to their favorite bar where you nursed a saucer of sake all night. The last thing you needed was for alcohol to loosen your tongue so you just enjoyed the moment with the three of them, your heart warm that they would want to include you.

And so it went, day after day, week after week you grew closer to all the people…no _characters_ …from an anime you'd loved for so long. You eventually even met Ichigo and Orihime and every time you met someone "new" you had to hold back asking them tons of questions about things you, for all intents and purposes, had no business knowing about them. The effort to remain purposefully oblivious while maintaining the lies you'd told about yourself had become exhausting and you found yourself, as much as you had grown to love these people even more since getting to know them, missing your world and your home. Plus, this world was really fucking scary. The first time you'd gone on a mission was of course with Renji and you'd almost become hollow food.

" __-chan, watch out!" shouted Renji as a black claw almost took your head off. Thankfully being in the Bleach world had imbued you with the same abilities you'd seen countless times on TV but actually performing said abilities was another matter entirely. You were scared shitless and no matter how much you told yourself you were a shinigami and could do this your legs wouldn't move. Your zanpakuto felt like heavy lead, trembling in your shaking hands. As the blow was just about to land an orange shield popped up. Inoue-san!_

 _Sending a thankful glance her way you finally were able to get yourself to move, albeit in retreat rather than attack._

 _Eventually when the fighting was over you found yourself cornered by a very angry lieutenant._

" _What the fuck was that? Were you trying to get yourself killed?" he bellowed and you decided he really was as scary in "real life" as you'd always thought he'd be. Tears stung the edges of your eyes but you fought them more valiantly than you had the hollow which had tried to kill you._

 _Ichigo stepped up then, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Hey Renji, let up a bit, she's fine."_

 _Renji whirled around on him. "She's supposed to be able to handle herself!" Turning back around his eyes held fire and…something else you weren't sure of at the moment. "When we get back you can expect a fuck ton of training, got it _-chan?" You nodded meekly and he walked away, leaving Orihime to comfort you._

He hadn't lied. The bastard trained you during every spare moment the two of you had which was a lot more than you thought he should have given his responsibilities as a fukutachio, but you were never allowed to refuse. You could see the "special treatment" you were getting didn't go unnoticed by the other members of division six but Renji either didn't notice or didn't care. You had no idea why he was so motivated to help you in particular but because you were under his command you had to go along with his orders.

Though he was tough on you, you were thankful for it when the next time you were sent on a mission with him you managed to take care of two hollows all on your own. The look of pride on his face had been unexpected as had the warm stirring in your heart. And that was when you realized you were in trouble and had to get out of there. You absolutely _could not_ fall for Renji, not for real. Sure, you'd harbored a fierce crush on him while watching the anime and reading the manga (you'd always been a sucker for muscles and tattoos) but actually allowing yourself to truly fall for him was pure idiocy.

Just as you'd made this decision you began to pick up on the tell tale signs that something had shifted with him too. His gaze lingered a bit longer on you during roll call, he was still giving you private training lessons, coming up with any manner of excuse to get you alone and each time your heart was torn between elation and dread.

A particularly intense sparring match the previous evening had nearly undone all your resolve.

 _Renji had been being even more aggressive than usual, his hits and strikes harder, quicker, and more intense. A leg shot out catching your own sending you to the ground. Before you could get up Renji was on you, pinning your hands above your head and your hips under his own. You struggled but it was no use; he was just too damn strong. This felt like one of the scenarios you'd written in one of your own fanfics but this was…this was real!_

 _Your heart was pounding, eyes half hooded looking up into his gorgeous face that was lined with sweat, the result of his relentless pursuit to put you into submission. A heated look, very different from anything you'd ever seen in his eyes, immobilized you more than his own form had. As if in slow motion he leaned down, his face getting closer and closer to yours, making your breath hitch. Just before he touched his lips to yours you breathed out, "Don't, please." The look in his eyes shifted from want to hurt and it pierced your heart but you couldn't do it, you couldn't allow this to happen no matter how much you wanted it to._

 _For just a moment you thought he wasn't going to listen then chastised yourself; this was Renji. He was respectful and protective of you, even from himself because he finally rose to his feet. You knew how much you'd hurt him when he strode off without a word, not even bothering to help you up. As you heard the training room door slide shut firmly you allowed yourself some tears; you truly cared about that man but had to let him go. Anything more between you would just hurt you both more._

Just as you are about to make it to the door Rukia is blocking your path and she looks pissed. Without warning she pulls you aside and hisses out, "I don't know what happened or what changed but know this, keep hurting Renji and I'll hurt you!"

You're shocked. "Kuchiki-taichou," you begin slowly, trying to keep your voice even and respectful even though you are boiling mad, "I don't know who told you what but there is not and never was anything going on between Abarai-fukutaichou and myself."

Her grip on your sleeve moves in a flash to your collar. For someone so small she sure is strong. "Bullshit," she spits viciously, "I've known him almost my whole life! I _know_ him through and through and seeing him with you…"she trails off, her eyes softening marginally. Oh Kami-sama, has she finally realized how she feels about him and _you_ are getting in the way of it? You, who has no intention of staying here once you're able to find your way out, are a blockade to these two getting together?

"Kuchiki-taichou," you say lowly easing your hand to hers that still grips your collar although much more loosely, "Forgive me for overstepping but…perhaps you see something between us because you finally see _him_ for all he's worth and you don't want to lose him."

You see the surprise in her eyes at your bold words but then she surprises you back by smiling faintly. "No, _-chan, I've always known Renji's worth. I love him, but it's familiar love."

"Then why are you so angry at me?" You can't stop the question coming from your mouth.

She fixes you with a firm stare. "Because for the first time since I've known him I see him looking at someone like Ichigo looks at Orihime and I don't want him hurt. So, whatever happened between you two, please…please fix it." Her words pierce your heart and you can't believe this is happening. You know how you feel but to hear from someone outside of the little bubble you and Renji had inadvertently created around yourselves that they see something deeper from him to you…it's overwhelming.

Unable to say anything you nod. It's a blatant lie, but you have to get out of here. Satisfied that is the best she is going to get from you Rukia returns to the party. Once the coast is clear you walk out the door.

Your sandals scrape against the gravel covered ground, the quiet of the night discomforting because it allows your thoughts to keep wandering back to Renji. How could you have let this happen? So lost in your own thoughts you don't sense he's near until it's too late; not that you could get away anyway. Even with excessive training you're still not that great at shunpo. Plus, Renji's been trained by the best in the shunpo business outside of Yoruichi.

In another move straight out of a shoujo manga Renji has you pinned up against the wall of the nearest building. His hands are on either side of your head, his gloriously firm body pressed against yours. But what is holding you in place more than anything else is his eyes, always his eyes. They are full of pain, confusion, hurt, some anger and…faintly…hope.

"_-chan," he says and his voice is raspy with the overlaid emotions, "Why are you running from me? I thought…" he trails off, averting his gaze for a moment before forcing it back to your own. He wants you to know how serious he is. "I thought…we have…had…something between us?"

You swallow the lump in your throat. This is it, you have to get him to believe there's nothing here and he should just move on.

"Abarai-fukutaichou,-"

"Renji," he interrupts and your downcast eyes shoot back up to his face. You shake your head. No, you can't call him Renji, you can't increase the already too deep intimacy between the two of you. You try to pull away forgetting the wall behind you but he sees the movement nonetheless and frowns. "_-chan, you…you're not afraid of me, are you?"

Truthfully, yes, you're terrified but it's not because you think he'll hurt you. It's the complete opposite. You know, instinctively and from the little bit he's allowed to show his care of you, that he'd been amazing as a significant other. So you shake your head, a few stray tears sliding down your cheeks. His calloused hands move to cup your face, thumbs brushing away the salty trails of pain and he leans his forehead against yours. Both of your eyes are closed, breaths mingling between you as the silence carries on.

"Tell me why," he says breaking it, "Tell me why you told me to stop last night."

You hitch your breath. You can't open your eyes, can't allow yourself to be swayed by his intense stare, the emotional storm brewing in his eyes.

"_-chan, look at me," he says in a pleading tone and it cracks your heart more. He's breaking through, slowly tearing down the wall you'd barely constructed to keep him out. Shit, you really are a weakling.

Opening your eyes you can't believe how he looks. His face is completely open, completely vulnerable. Without a word he's baring his heart and soul to you. Taking a deep breath you decide you owe him the truth. Hell, maybe it will make him think you're crazy and he should stay the hell away from you. The thought hurts but you press on; this has to be done.

"Abarai-" he fixes you with a glare and you amend to, "Renji." He smiles faintly for the first time all night and it's like seeing the sun after a heavy storm. Taking another deep breath you start again, "Renji, it's not that you're wrong. I…there is something between us…but mostly it's lies." You see confusion flash over his face but before he can speak you continue on, "You see, I…I haven't been honest with you…at all. About….about who I am…where I came from…" you trail off.

He pulls back thankfully to give you some breathing room but stays close, his hands resting on your waist. "Tell me," he says and you look back at him.

"Well, this is going to sound crazy but…I'm not from here and I'm not talking about Soul Society. I'm talking about…from this world…this _whole_ world." You can see he's confused, who wouldn't be by what you're saying?

Huffing out in frustration with yourself you finally just spit it out. "Renji, I'm from a completely different world. A world where all of this," you trail your hands and eyes around the two of you before fixing your eyes back on his face, "Where _you_ …are not real. You're all a part of a manga called Bleach."

For a moment there is complete silence as he takes in your words. Then he bursts out laughing. Shocked at the loud sound you get angry. He's laughing at you! You push against his chest but his grip only tightens. "Pretending to be crazy isn't going to deter me _-chan," he chuckles. Were you not so pissed off you would think such a thing to be sweet. But he's laughing at you, laughing at what you are, who you are, your world!

You push again, much more firmly and say with all the anger you can pull from your chest, "Get the fuck off me Abarai." You see surprise in his face as he registers that you're serious. You're serious and you're pissed. His surprise provides an opening and you slip from his grasp but you don't make it far before he's gripping your wrist again.

Before you can yell to let go he speaks. "Alright, _-chan, let's say you're right, that all of this and all of us are really a part of a made up world. How the hell did you end up here then?" He turns to face you as he ends his question.

You feel your anger melting to be replaced by frustration. "If I knew that I would have already made it back to where I belong!" you say heatedly. You're not prepared for what happens next. Renji pulls you violently into his arms, his lips colliding with yours in a heated, passionate kiss. A deep moan pulls from your throat and before you can stop yourself your hands are around his neck, finger tips digging into the base of his pony tail. His lips massage yours open, his tongue hot and wicked in your mouth stealing your very breath. His arms constrict around your waist tighter in an effort, you swear, to fuse your bodies together.

Finally he pulls back and you both suck in air. Trailing a hand through your hair he grasps the back of your head, firmly holding you still to look into his eyes. "Where you belong," he says throatily, "is with me."

Any protest on your part dies in another searing kiss. You've wanted this, oh Kami-sama how you have, for so long. It was as if you'd been drawn to him like a magnet and the efforts to alter your polarization has left you weak willed and vulnerable. Renji Abarai, _the_ Renji Abarai, just basically confessed that he wants you.

"Renji," you breathe out as his mouth moves to suckle your throat sending tingles down your spine. God he's good at this! Your brain is muddled, fogging more and more the longer he kisses your skin, holds you close, as if you're his lifeline.

You don't remember moving but soon you're down on your back on a futon; _his_ futon. You're in his private quarters and he's pinned you to his bed. Kami-sama help you, this is going too fast! It's not like you've never done this before but it was always with someone you were established with. Pushing on his shoulder gets him to briefly come out of his lust filled haze to look down at you.

You're both breathing hard, chests rising and falling as you struggle to gain back your breath.

"Renji," you start again, "I…I can't do this…I'm not meant to be here and taking things this far is just going to hurt both of us."

He leans down, kissing you gently. His tenderness pulls at your heart and you can't stop yourself from kissing him back. Pulling away again he trails his hand down the side of your face. His eyes are full of adoration and a slight smirk quirks his lips up. "_-chan, I don't care if it's for one more day or until the end of our lives, I want you. I want to be with you, for as long as we have. Please," he leans down and kisses your neck again pulling a sigh from your lips, "Please let me show you how much I love you."

Your breath hitches; love? He _loves_ you?! No one…no one has ever said those words to you, never made you feel like you were the most important person in their whole world, or rather made you their whole world. It's overwhelming and humbling and terrifying all at once because you allow yourself to embrace what you've known for a while now; you've fallen in love with him too.

"Show me," you whisper and you feel him pause, possibly from shock that you've suddenly agreed. But the next moment he's flung himself up to his knees and pulled open his kosode. Rippling muscles and tattoos emerge before your hungry gaze. You've seen him like this, of course, in all the manga and images you've looked up, but _nothing_ compares to it in real life. Leaning up you trail your hands over his heated skin.

"Kami-sama, you're gorgeous," you whisper and he grins at you. Clearly the ego had been stroked but you don't care, you've been lying to him since day one and you're not going to lie to him now. He reaches down and undoes your hakama-himo, pulling apart your layers quickly but gently. When you are bare before him in nothing but a bra and panties his heavy trails gaze over you, almost like a caress.

Leaning down his rock hard chest presses against your breasts and you sigh. He really is all muscle. Lips tease the skin of your neck, trailing up to your ear whose lobe gets nipped playfully. Strong arms wrap around you and pull up your torso to get access to the clasp of your bra. With one flick of his wrist it's released and your breasts spill out.

Once you're on your back again Renji looks at you once more. "You are so fucking beautiful," he whispers before latching onto a pert nipple and sucking firmly.

"Oh god Renji," you breath and feel him grin against your skin. His mouth and tongue are weapons of mass pleasure inducement and you can feel your panties becoming soaked with your own essence the longer he laps and suckles your breasts, switching back and forth between the two and alternating the mouth action with a firm massage from his hand. Soon you feel his fingers teasing over your covered core and you groan at this touch, your hand flying to the back of his head and gripping his hair firmly.

He chuckles. "Seems someone's eager," he teases and you smack his back making him laugh.

The next moment cool air hits your heated center when the panties are ripped from your body. You've read and written this scenario a dozen times but experiencing it is _so much better_. One finger and then two enter you and your rasping out, "Renji!" The next second you're moaning loudly as his tongue caresses your folds teasing you by staying just out of reach of where you really want him. Bucking up your hips you whimper, "Please Renji, please."

"Well, since you asked so nicely," he rumbles against your thigh then plunges his tongue fully into you making you scream out.

He delves deeper, pushing what you have now determined to be your most favorite muscle he possesses, further into your dripping core.

"Oh god, Renji, yes, yes, please!" you beg and _finally_ he circles your clit once with his tongue before latching his lips over it and sucking hard. You are sure your throat will be raw tomorrow from your screaming and also sure anyone within a ten mile radius of his home will know just who is doing what to you. But none of that matters because Renji Abarai has just given you the best orgasm of your life and he loves you.

You barely catch your breath before his hakama are whipped off and he's plunging his full length into you. "Oh shit," you cry out but it feels so good. You finally open your eyes and when they meet his you can't help but smile pulling a grin to his lips as well. He leans down and kisses you firmly, tongue slicing through the seam of your mouth to plunder your depths above as he does the same below. His thrusts are hard and fast, his pent up lust and desire for you clearly having been held by a very thin string. That knowledge burns through your veins and as he pounds into you, you cry out, "I love you!"

His sudden halt of motion startles you. He leans down kissing you softly. Then maintaining eye contact he commands, "Tell me again."

You smile. "I love you." A firm thrust makes your breath catch.

He kisses you harder then breathes out, "Again, tell me again, _-chan."

"I love you Renji, I love you," you say over and over because it's true. You've finally allowed someone in, someone who sees potential in you and pushes you towards greatness. Someone who is passionate and sweet and caring despite his rough exterior. Someone you can literally trust with your life. Someone who won't run away when things are hard, who will chase you when you run though you're never going to run again.

"I love you _-chan," he breathes into your ear and you shudder.

He picks up the pace again, driving into you harder than before. Reaching between your legs he caresses your clit and you scream out, another orgasm surprising you.

"Oh fuck," he growls and you can feel him coming, his warmth spreading all the way to the center of your body. When it's over he lays on top of you kissing your forehead, your cheeks and then your lips. Cupping your face with one hand, the other occupied with keeping his full weight off of you he trails his thumb back and forth across your cheek.

"I'm yours, _-chan, for as long as you're here and for as long as you'll have me," he says looking into your eyes.

You're overwhelmed, tears of joy trailing down your cheeks. Craning your neck up you kiss him. "As long as I'm with you, I'm home," you say and truly believe it.


	2. Renji- Save the Last Dance

A/N: I asked howlingforrenji for a scenario and was requested to show a jealous Renji. I'll admit this was harder to write than I thought it would be. I came up with two ideas, one with him established in a relationship and one with him discovering his want of one. Here is the first.

 **Save the Last Dance for Me**

 _By: bleachfanficfanatic_

Reflected in the mirror before you, you can see a grumbling Renji scowling at the wall. Really, sometimes you can't believe how immature he can be about some things, but that's part of his endearment you suppose. Your eyes shift back to the task of putting on lipstick, the last thing you need is to smudge and have to do your whole face over again.

As you progress you hear his gruff voice ask, "Why do you even want to go?"

You sigh as you finish your lips and turn them up in a bemused smile. "It's good exercise."

"So is sparring," he grumbles and you chuckle.

"It's _fun,_ " you emphasize.

He frowns deeper, crossing his arms as his eyes meet yours in the reflective glass. "And sparring isn't?" he questions.

"Careful Renji, you're eleventh division is showing," you quip. He grunts something unintelligible beneath his breath as you take one last look in the mirror. Perfect.

You turn around quickly, your fluttery yellow dress whirling around you and stroll up to him placing your hands on his chest. Even in heels you have to go on tiptoes to reach his lips which you peck lightly before saying, "I'll be back late, see you tomorrow."

"Tch, you think you're going by yourself? No way, I don't care if I'm not able to do it, but I'll be damned if you're going without me."

You roll your eyes and kiss his cheek leaving a lipstick print. You're tempted to leave it there but he's already in such a piss poor mood it will just make things worse. Sighing you rub it off with your thumb before meeting your gaze to his again. "Fine, but you'll have to meet us there because I don't have time to wait for you to get into your gigai." You fish out a business card from your purse. "Here's the address, see you later Mr. Paranoid."

You tap his cheek with the palm of your hand and stride out the door purposefully swaying your hips. You know he hates to see you leave but loves to watch you go so you usually try to put on a show for him.

Renji curses under his breath as he struggles to get into his gigai. No matter your reason he can't help the sting he felt when you said you didn't have time to wait for him. It's stupid, he knows he should have been ready to go when you were but he'd been too busy arguing with himself to pay attention to the damn time. But once he saw you in your dress, all made up to go out with someone else his resolve to stay behind crumbled. So now here he was, pissed because you're insisting on going to this stupid place and horny because you just had to sashay away like that.

Finally he makes it in the damn faux body and gets dressed in black slacks, a black button down and red tie.

When he enters the dance hall his eyes find you immediately. Taking a seat at the bar he orders a scotch. Once it's in his hand he turns and leans back against the bar watching you. He knows he shouldn't be jealous, there's no reason to be. You're with Yumichika and he knows there's nothing between the two of you because you're faithful and he's too in love with himself to need another person. But emotions have a funny way sending logic and reason to the far corners of the earth and as he watches you swing and sway about the dance floor he can feel his body tense.

As Yumi's hands glide over your waist, hold your hands, twirl you around, pull you close and touch your neck he feels his own hands tighten into fists, his jaw clenching so tight he's sure his teeth will crack. His breathing is labored. This was decidedly a very stupid idea because no matter how much he tells himself to calm down and it's not a big deal he can't get over that someone other than himself is touching you like that. Truthfully Renji had never realized how sensual dancing could be having not really participated in it himself. It always felt like something foolishly over complicated that he'd rather avoid. He remembers your quip about the eleventh and finds it ironic now given that you're dancing with someone from said division rather than with him, your boyfriend.

You, of course, had asked him to accompany you but when he'd made it clear he wouldn't be caught dead on a dance floor you found someone who was willing to take you. For just a second he'd thought you'd done that to goad him into saying yes but thankfully he'd held his tongue; he knew you better than that.

You felt your solution of going with someone who has absolutely no interest in you at all and who will actually enjoy said activity was perfect. And initially Renji had agreed. But now…now he is regretting his hasty refusal. Because you look almost ethereal whipping back and forth across the floor, your feet moving in quick steps, your eyes shining with joy and one of the biggest smiles he's ever seen plastered on your face. As your hair whips around along with your dress he makes a decision. Downing the last of his drink he strides out of the door back to the shop and drops off his gigai.

Upon arrival back to Soul Society he seeks out the one person he knows can help him.

Back in the living world you're seated with Yumi taking a break but your eyes are constantly moving seeking a certain red head. Frowning you excuse yourself to the restroom to touch up. That done, you walk the perimeter of the dance hall only to find he's really not here. Unexpectedly you feel a little hurt. He did say he didn't want you here without him but maybe he decided it was best he not come. You shrug and head back to Yumichika. Eventually the two of you have danced your feet into oblivion and decide to call it quits.

When you reach the shop you're surprised to learn from Kisuke that Renji already left back to Soul Society. He couldn't even wait until tomorrow so you could go together? The hurt feeling increases but you push it down. Maybe you shouldn't have been so insistent on doing this. You'd seen the look in his eyes when you'd announced you found another dance partner but damn it you're allowed to have hobbies that you enjoy too! So you'd gone ahead with your plan of going dancing with Yumichika.

Time goes by and you begin to worry you may have inadvertently thrown a wrench into your relationship. Renji is more distant, constantly having to work late and seemingly unwilling to come over to see you as much as before claiming exhaustion.

When you ask him if anything's wrong he smirks. "Just Kuchiki-taichou riding my ass all the time." He kisses your head. "Don't worry _-chan, things should quiet down soon."

You know you trust him, he's not the kind to go running around on you but your heart clenches painfully each night that goes by and he's not with you. Prior to your dance date with Yumichika, Renji was at your house or you at his almost every night. You practically lived together despite having separate dwellings. But now he's absent, busy, tired and…secretive. You shake your head.

" _Who's paranoid now?"_ you chastise yourself.

A month later you're shocked when you arrive home to find a dozen roses, pink and red, along with a card and a white box. Opening the card your lips tug up into a smile.

" __-chan, I know I've been distant and busy all of last month and I'm sorry. To make it up to you I want to take you out tonight. Put on your present and be ready for me by 7:30. – Renji"_

Turning your attention to the box you undo the purple bow and open it. You gasp as you take out a bright red dress. Bouncing excitedly you rush into your bedroom to try it on. As the slinky material glides over your hourglass form you're shocked by how well it fits despite being the tightest item of clothing you've ever put on. The back is low, almost touching the top of your butt and there is a long slit up the right side showing your strong leg nicely. The neck line is high so you opt for a string of simple pearls.

Putting on black high heels you step back to admire the results. You never knew Renji had such great taste in clothes but this dress makes you feel like a goddess! Looking at the clock you see you only have twenty more minutes until he's scheduled to arrive so you quickly twirl your hair up into a bun and put on mascara, eyeliner and deep red lipstick.

Precisely at 7:30 there is a knock at your door sending a barrage of butterflies into your stomach. Opening it you hitch your breath. Renji is stand there with another half dozen roses in his hands. He's dressed in a black shirt, the top two buttons undone showing part of his chiseled chest, and black loose but not too loose slacks with black shoes on his feet. His bright red hair is braided, the braid trailing over the front of his shoulder.

His eyes go wide and you blush under the intensity of his stare. It's almost like he's seeing the dress for the first time. Silently he hands you the roses and you thank him softly. As you turn to add them to the existing dozen you hear his breath catch.

Whirling back around at the sound you're surprised to see his eyes glazing over with heat.

"Damn it," he breaths out lifting his hand to touch your face, "she really knows how to pick'em."

"She? What are you talking about Renji?" you ask confused.

"Rangiku, she…she helped me by picking your outfit. I had no idea what to get but, shit, she outdid herself this time."

You giggle and make a mental note to thank your fellow fukutaichou later for her assistance. Reaching up you wrap your arms around Renji's neck prompting his own to encircle your waist. The dress is low enough that you feel his heated touch on your skin and it makes goosebumps erupt all over.

"So, where are we going?" you ask and he blinks.

"Huh? Oh right, um, it's a surprise. Come on." He tugs your hand with a mischievous grin on his face.

Slowly you walk down the street through the balmy night and you can't help but feel content now that he's by your side again, though walking on these roads in your heels is proving more difficult than you'd like to admit. Noticing your struggle Renji reaches down and pulls you into his arms. Without another word he moves into flash step towards your destination. As you get closer he says, "Close your eyes." You obey, tingling with excitement.

When you land it's so tempting to open your eyes but you keep them closed. You hear a door open and are ushered inside somewhere before it shuts again. He guides you and soon you are seated. He whispers in your ear, "Ok, open your eyes."

You open them to find a romantic dinner for two set up in one of the training rooms. "It's the best space I could find," he says sheepishly and you smile.

Leaning up you kiss his lips gently before saying, "It's perfect, thank you."

Over the course of your meal you catch up. He wasn't the only one who was busy and he laughs heartily at your tales of you and Nanao working in tandem to get your troublesome taichou and sotaicho to do their jobs.

Eventually the meal is done but before you can stand he's steps next to you extending his hand. As you take it he snaps his fingers and suddenly there's music playing. Your eyes widen in surprise as he tugs your body to his, his hand trailing down the length of your back making you shiver.

His eyes hold promises of pleasure and you tremble in anticipation. Leaning down he kisses you slow, long and deep, massaging your neck and turning you into putty. Pulling back he whispers, "May I have this dance?"

You almost fall over from shock. Dance? Renji? Your face betrays your surprise and he chuckles. Silently he pulls you to the center of the room and you finally realize what the music you're hearing is: tango.

Oh Kami-sama, he's going to _tango_ with you?

He pulls you into his arms a small grin on his face.

"What brought this on?" you ask allowing him to guide you where he wants.

His expression loses its playfulness for a moment and you sort of regret the question but your curiosity has been peaked. Grasping your chin he looks in your eyes. "I don't want anyone touching you like that but me," he confesses.

You let out a huff of incredulous laughter. "Don't tell me you were jealous?" He doesn't respond and your eyes widen. Placing a hand on his cheek you soften your gaze. "Renji, you were jealous? Of Yumichika? Seriously?"

He shrugs, embarrassment tingeing his cheeks as he averts his gaze. You draw him back and kiss him. "Dance with me you fool," you say and he finally smiles again.

He pulls you even closer, your bodies pressed together and the heat radiating from his skin is hot but your love his burn; he's always run hot in more ways than one. His hand trails down your exposed back again making you arch even closer if that were possible, your breasts pressing against his chest. You've had to wear a backless sticky bra with this ensemble and as his hand trails lower to grasp your ass you see his eyes widen. You aren't wearing any panties.

A coy grin splits your face as you begin to move together to the rhythm of the music. He's surprisingly good for someone who claims he never dances. His hips roll deliciously against you and you gasp as his very firm erection presses momentarily your core before retreating back. He whips you around, your back pressing against his front and strong hands trail up your thighs to grab your waist. Every move is slow and calculated, each touch electric making your pulse jump.

He grabs your hand and twirls you around before pulling you close again, his hand against your back once more as you step, step, step across the floor. He's leading beautifully and you can't help your eyebrow quirking up in a silent question, " _When and where did you learn this?"_

You're spun around once more before he wraps your arms up around his neck so you're stretched out against him, his hands sliding down your torso before grasping your hips. His breath pants against your neck heating you further. He answers your question simply, "Rangiku."

Instantly you feel a tight bunch in your heart. Rangiku? He's danced like this…with Rangiku? "Is _this_ where you've been spending your nights the last month?" you ask unable to keep the hint of irritation out of your tone. He picks up on it immediately and whips you back around to face him.

Your noses almost touch and he smiles cockily. " _Now_ who's jealous?" he asks cheekily and you want to smack him even though he's right. If he shouldn't worry about Yumichika, you shouldn't worry about Rangiku. In fact, you're certain this whole evening would never have happened if it weren't for her.

"Point made," you concede and his grin widens knowing he's off the hook.

The longer you dance the more your desire grows for him. It's been too long since you last did a tango of the horizontal persuasion. Finally you can't take it any longer. The sensual touches, the heat of him and the music pulsing around you build your sexual frustration to frightening heights. He twirls you around, releasing your hand just as he should but instead of waiting for him to come to you, you face him immediately and run, jumping into his arms and wrapping your legs around his waist.

"Renji," you breathe against his lips before sealing them with yours, tongue darting out to claim his. He groans into your mouth, one arm easily holding you up as his other hand trails to your hair pulling it free allowing it to cascade around your shoulders.

The next moment you're pressed against the wall and moaning as his lips trail down your throat, sucking hard just below your jaw line bringing gasps and pants from your mouth. "Renji, I need you, I need you now," you plead and he grunts.

He sets you down to undo his belt buckle. As the zipper is undone you pull roughly to expose him in all his firm glory. Unable to resist you drop to your knees and take him in one go.

"Fucking hell," he gasps out as your tongue roams over his length, your lips creating a firm sucking sensation that has him trembling. Were your mouth not full of him right now you'd be grinning at his reaction, but you've missed him and you're busy. You take him in again and his hands fly to the wall for purchase. You want to see his face but from your vantage it's impossible so you focus on making him feel as good as you can. He's gone through a lot of trouble and effort to show you how much he cares about you so he deserves one hell of a reward.

"_-chan, stop, please, I…I want to fuck you…please," he pants. Begging, there's something you never thought you'd hear from Abarai-fukutaichou and it turns you on even more. With one last lingering suck you release him. He's on you in a flash, literally, pinning you to the mat and hiking up your dress.

In one fluid motion he's seated fully in you causing both of you to moan loudly. He doesn't even bother to remove his shirt, which is fine with you because it gives you something to hold onto. He pulls back and slams forward again. You open your eyes and see an inferno in his letting you know that first thrust was a warning shot and this will not be slow and gentle. It will be fast, hard and hot, just like the dance you were sharing earlier.

Fulfilling your expectation he leans down and draws you up before leaning back. He's kneeling, your thighs draped on either side of his own. He lifts you by your hips as if you weigh nothing at all and slams you back down on his rod.

"Renji!" you exclaim and he does it again and again and again. He's driving you onto him like a piston and it's the most exhilarating screw you've ever had. He doesn't stop, doesn't slow down, just keeps going. The room fills with unrefined grunting and moans but you're too far gone to care. Finally he hits deep within you a spot that has you seeing stars and you're screaming as you come.

He's not far behind you, spilling himself deep in your body. You're both panting heavily as you collapse on the mat in a tangle of limbs, disheveled clothing and hair strewn about. Eventually you get up and put yourselves back together.

"Remind me to buy Rangiku a bottle of sake as a thank you," you mumble as you walk towards the door. He chuckles and kisses the top of your head. You stop, looking up at him. "Maybe I should make you jealous more often."

He frowns and smacks your ass firmly. "Don't you dare," he growls and you laugh leaning up to kiss him.

"Love you," you say and it brings a smile back to his face.

"Love ya too babe," he says kissing you back.


	3. Renji - Friends to Lovers

A/N: Here's the second idea for a jealous Renji. Jealousy is challenging to write so I hope I hit the right tone with this.

* * *

 **Friends to Lovers**

 _By: bleachfanficfanatic_

Renji can feel an eye twitch developing the longer he watches you, your words becoming a white noise as a headache makes itself known. It's not that he dislikes talking with you, quite the opposite in fact. You've become one of his best friends because you're just so damn easy to get along with. Unlike other women he's befriended you don't bring about unnecessary drama and the simplicity of your friendship is refreshing. Plus you've seen him at his absolute worst and are still around.

" _So why do I feel like I'm being stabbed in the chest?"_

"So what do you think?" you ask turning from your closet. You frown. Renji is staring at the wall. Walking up to him you flick his ear and he jerks his head to look at you.

"What?" he asks gruffly and you almost flinch. What's got his panties in a bunch?

"I asked you a question asshole. What's going on with you?" you ask crossing your arms.

"Nothin'," he grumbles, "what was the question?"

You sigh. If Renji doesn't want to tell you what's wrong you won't push it, it'll just make it worse. Taking a deep breath you ask holding up your new dress, "What do you think of this dress?" You're surprised to see him appear to actually be thinking before answering. Most guys would just spout out "Fine" or "I dunno know" or even more irritatingly just shrug. Finally he looks up with a slight grin.

"Not sure, I'd have ta see it on ya," he replies. This surprises you but you smile at his reinvigorated (however slight) interest. You really do want an opinion on this before your date shows up and you end up looking like a fool.

"Ok, give me a minute," you say and head into the bathroom.

As soon as the door shuts Renji lets out a frustrated breath. What the hell is the matter with him? Spacing out, ignoring you, this isn't how he usually is when he's with you. Usually you have all of his attention or he's teasing you or you tease him or something. But ever since you'd announced that afternoon you were going on a date with Ikkaku he's been feeling unease, which doesn't make any sense because the cue ball is, while irritating and a bit too fight obsessive, overall a good guy. He should be happy that someone he trusts as much as him wants to take his best friend out. So why-

His thoughts abruptly cut short as you emerge from the bathroom. No one should be allowed to look this good in such a simple dress. But the navy blue sets off the red highlights in your hair and the shimmering green eye shadow contrasts the brown of your irises making them brighter. Your lips are tinted a faint pink and he realizes just how infrequently he's seen you wear makeup. Not that you need it, but there's something about the way you look now that is short circuiting the synapses in his brain.

"So? You think it's a good choice?" you ask him nervously. The blank expression on his face either means it's really good or really bad. But before he can answer there's a knock at the door. Your eyes shoot to the clock. "Shit! I didn't realize it was already so late," you exclaim and rush back to your closet to grab shoes. Over your shoulder you say, "Well, I hope it's good because I don't have a choice now."

You chuckle as you walk by Renji ruffling the top of his head and making him grunt in irritation at you messy up his pony tail. "Thanks for nothin' you bump on a log, see ya later," you say good-naturedly and walk to your door. Opening it you find Ikkaku standing there in dark blue jeans and white button shirt, though the sleeves have been ripped showing off his biceps. It's a look you're sure only he can pull off.

"Heya, _-chan, you look great," he says grinning.

"Thanks, um, one sec," you say and turn to shout over your shoulder, "Renji, I'm leaving, can you make sure to lock up before you go?" You hear a muffled affirmation of your request and turn back to your date. "Let's go!" you say excitedly.

He takes you to a simple restaurant, a basic first date but that's fine with you. You don't think you can handle anything more complicated. To your surprise, Ikkaku proves himself a fairly good conversationalist even if most of stories are about battles. But you don't mind. At the end of the evening he walks you home.

"I had a great time tonight," you offer and he grins.

"Me too, _-chan, I'm glad you finally agreed to go out," he replies and you blush. It's true you've been making excuses to not go out with him, your troublesome heart waiting and hoping for a particular shinigami to take his red head out of his ass but deep down you know that's not likely. The last time Renji allowed himself to open his heart to a friend in that way it crashed and burned all around him.

That was part of how you and he became so close. He needed a safe place to mend his broken heart and you were there. You've always been there but he finally saw you, at least in terms of being a reliable friend.

Not that you blame Rukia, well, not any more. At first you were out for blood when you'd heard she rejected him. He had been surprised at your violent reaction, clearly unaware of how much you cared about him. Quickly he had insisted it wasn't her fault and he wasn't angry, at least not at her.

Her hands were tied. As a noble woman she had no say in whom she could be with and the Kuchiki clan is dead set against another "commoner" being added to their ranks. Even Byakuya's influence did nothing to sway their decision and so Rukia was left with the choice of marry who they approve or not marry at all. Unsurprisingly she opted for the latter, electing to step into the captaincy of the thirteenth division offered her when Ukitake stepped down, his health finally pushing him into retirement, though he still frequents the office to check up on his former subordinate.

And so over the last few years you'd grown even closer to your fellow fukutaichou, your heart being filled with him more and more but you won't put him in that position. He always comments on how he enjoys the simplicity of your friendship and to your ears that means that's all it will ever be. So you finally decided to give into Ikkaku's advances in an attempt to move forward with your life sans romantic inclinations towards Renji.

In your musings you've failed to notice Ikkaku is leaning his head down closer to yours. Your heart skips a beat; is he going to kiss you? Do you want him to kiss you? " _Too late now,"_ you think as inches become centimeters which become millimeters. When he's a hair's breadth away from your lips you squeak in surprise as your door opens behind you. You were leaning on it and presumably turned the knob unconsciously in your fidgeting. As your ass hits the ground you groan. When you open your eyes you can see Ikkaku trying desperately not to laugh and failing miserable.

"Go ahead, I'm a fucking moron," you grumble and he chortles loudly as he reaches down to pull you to your feet. "Alright, alright, that's enough," you say as dust yourself off. Leaning forward you peck his cheek making his laughter stop abruptly. "Good night Ikkaku," you say sweetly and enter your home on your feet this time.

The next week you have another date set up with Ikkaku, this time in the living world to go to a dance club. You've never been and are quite nervous but he insists you'll have fun. You've opted to wear black shorts and a halter top showing off your strong back and shoulders and high heels on your feet, all recommendations from Rangiku. With your hair tied up in a tight pony tail and make up done you're ready for him to pick you up.

A knock at the door pulls you to it but when it's opened you're surprised to find Renji standing there. He looks equally surprised but you're sure it's because of your outfit.

"Where're you goin'?" he asks before you can ask why he's there.

"Ikkaku is taking me dancing," you answer bubbly.

The wind is effectively ripped from your sails when he asks roughly, "And you're wearing _that_?" His eyes are hard, clear disapproval in them. You feel a swell of anger rip through you.

"So what if I am? Who are you, my dad?" you ask heatedly and slam the door behind you. You need to walk off some of this irritation before seeing Ikkaku so you stride down the path you know he'll be headed to get you leaving Renji behind.

" _The nerve of that guy!"_ you think as you walk quickly down the road. Soon enough you spy Ikkaku coming up towards you and force a smile for him.

"_-chan, what are you doing out here? I would haven't come an' got ya," he asks.

"Just needed to cool my head, Renji's being an ass," you say and he looks surprised.

"Tch, never thought I'd see the day where you two were fighting," he comments as you make your way to the official senkaimon.

"Yeah, well, insulting a girl's appearance right before she's set to go on a date tends to lend itself to less than a positive reaction," you grumble.

"He did what now?"

"He disapproves of my attire apparently, but whatever, doesn't matter. I mean, unless, do you think I should change?" you ask, suddenly aware that maybe there really is something wrong with what you're wearing.

"Hell no, you look fucking hot!" Ikkaku exclaims and you giggle.

Eventually you are at the club trying to have a good time. The room is packed making it easier for you to hide your awkward movements but pressed up against Ikkaku you feel a mixture of pleasure and guilt. You are for the most part having a good time and there is some part of you that is attracted to him, but your mind is constantly wandering back to your tiff with Renji. You don't like being at odds with him, or him thinking less of you.

Suddenly you feel a familiar ripple of reiatsu. Both of you look up to see Renji barreling through the throngs of people surrounding you.

"What the hell?" Ikkaku's voice echoes your thoughts but you find yourself unable to move or speak. The look in Renji's eyes is fearsome. Reaching forward he plucks you none too gently from Ikkaku's hold.

"What the fuck Renji?" he asks and is answered with a punch to the face. A startled cry emits from the crowd around you, someone calling out, "Fight!" Immediately a circle forms around the three of you. Since when was there all this space?

Ikkaku strides forward teeth bared. "You're gonna regret that you fucking pineapple," he growls and whips out a kick in Renji's direction catching him in the gut. Renji grunts and throws another punch, this one to Ikkaku's temple. Soon they are punching, kicking and grappling all over the dance floor, people either screaming in fear or yelling encouragement, picking sides for men they don't even know.

And the whole time you stand there with your eyes wide and you're sure your mouth open. When two bouncers are effortlessly thrown back by both men you finally come out of your daze. You have to end this. Surging forward you put up your hands to block both men from advancing towards each other again.

"That's enough!" you shout over the din of music. Your eyes flash in fury at Renji. Striding up to him you poke his chest roughly punctuating each of your words, "Just who the fuck do you think you are, Abarai?" He doesn't answer and you continue your tirade, "You think you can just come in here and pick a fight? And why are you? Ikkaku is your friend! What the hell is your problem?!" You're shouting now.

Unexpectedly he grabs your shoulders and pulls you close to his face. You suck in a breath. Leaning forward he whispers in your ear, "I don't like him touching what's mine."

Before you can protest his arrogant statement his lips seal over yours, his tongue plunging into your already open mouth. With one roll against your own you feel your knees almost give out. He tightens his hold, squeezing your arms almost painfully. When he pulls back you open your eyes, unaware you'd even closed them, and find him staring into your face.

"Renji," you breathe out, "what is going on? Why…why are you doing this?"

"Because I finally figured out what it was I was feeling and couldn't wait another moment to tell you," he says heedless of the many eyes staring at the two of you. Swallowing once he goes on, "You mean the world to me, _-chan, and I'm sorry it took me turning into a jealous bastard to realize it."

You heart is pounding against your rib cage. Is he saying what you think he's saying?

A throat clearing draws your attention back to Ikkaku who is sporting a new shiner on his eye. Pulling forcefully away from Renji you go to him. "Ikkaku, I'm so sorry, are you alright?"

"I'm fine, _-chan," he says before moving you to the side. Striding up to Renji he grabs his collar and pulls his face to his own. "Treat'er right you moron, cause if you don't I'll be there to kick your ass."

Renji nods once and Ikkaku walks out of the club leaving you stunned but then Renji is tugging you out of the doors before the bouncers or management can make their way to you. Once you are far away from the club he slows his pace until you're walking side by side in silence, the moon lighting your path.

"So, you were jealous huh?" you ask nudging him with your shoulder.

His arm shoots around you and pulls you close. "Insanely," he mutters against your neck making you sigh.

Pulling back you look up into his face. "And just how did you figure out I feel the same way about you? I mean, it's not like I've broadcast it."

He grinned. "Ichigo, well, he and Orihime" he supplies and your face betrays your shock.

"What do you mean?" you ask.

He pulls you closer. "After you left tonight I couldn't get over how I'd treated you and how pissed off I was that you were out with Ikkaku again. When there was a call out for assistance with a hollow infestation I took it. Of course Ichigo was there. After it was all done he asked me what was wrong."

You can see his cheeks heating up as memory of the conversation takes hold and it makes you giggle at how cute he looks. "At first I told him nothing but then he asked if it had something to do with you." He chuckled, "I didn't hide well at all that it did. Orihime overheard us and asked if you'd finally told me how you felt. You should have seen Ichigo's face trying to signal to her to be quiet."

Your own cheeks heat up. Orihime has been your one confidant because if anyone knows about the pain of unrequited love it's her, though those days are long gone now since finally marrying Ichigo.

Renji shrugs. "Of course at that point it was too late and she told me. I got so pissed, mostly at myself, and Ichigo basically kicked me in the ass telling me to not be a pansy and go after what I really wanted. But when I came in and saw Ikkaku with his hands all over you, fuck, I'm surprised I didn't actually kill him." His voice is rough now, darker and you're thankful that some semblance of sanity remained otherwise Ikkaku may have gotten seriously hurt.

Touching his cheek you bring his eyes back to yours. "I love you, idiot," you say and his eyebrows rise. Then he grins and leans down kissing you firmly.

Pulling back he murmurs, "I love you too."


	4. Renji- Desert to Dog House

**A/N: I was in the mood to write something slightly angsty that ends sweet. And apparently I have Renji on the brain, but that's fine because he deserves our attention!**

 _Scenario: S/O is beyond pissed because Renji went to Hueco Mundo without telling her he was leaving and just returned. Slightly altered order of events, I have the whole gang returning to Soul Society for healing and recovery. Also made it that getting to her and the rescue took longer than a couple days._

* * *

 **From the Desert to the Dog House – Renji**

 _By: bleachfanficfanatic_

Your sandals slap heavily against your feet as you tear across the seireitei, destination the fourth division. You'd use shunpo except you're sure you'll end up cannoning into a wall so in efforts to avoid adding to the pile of injured personnel fourth is dealing with you opt to hoof it. That and you're hoping it will give you time to calm your raging anger because if it doesn't and Renji's still alive you just might kill him yourself.

Panting heavily you round a corner and tear up the path through the gates of the domain belonging to the healers of Soul Society before careening into the recovery ward. Unsurprisingly it's loud in here, voices carrying over one another as lead healers shout orders to subordinates and reunions of friends are made.

"Everyone made it back alive, it's a miracle," you overhear someone say.

Now that you're sure your lover has returned safe if not sound you're back to raging pissed at him. And when his eyes lock with yours from across the room you can see he knows he's in deep shit. Scratch that. He's in the dog house, which is full of shit and then buried in it you're _that incensed_. When you narrow your eyes he flinches.

" _Good,"_ you think. Now, if only you could maintain this façade and stop these stupid tears from falling it would help the whole "I'm fierce and will kick your ass" motif you have going on. But when you see his eyes fill with pain at the sight of yours you suddenly don't mind the hot, salty trails leaving puddles on the floor. You know it's childish but you feel he deserves to feel terrible after what he did.

Slowly he stands and you can't help noticing he's shaky on his feet. His uniform is in tatters, dried blood crusted on his arms, his neck, his face and you can't stop yourself from wondering how much of it is his own. The thought makes your insides twist but you stubbornly hold onto your rage. He doesn't deserve welcome home hugs or kisses; he deserves another punch to the face. How could he just leave and not tell you?

And it's not like life's been a walk in the fucking park for you either. Your mind skitters over the last few weeks and its horrors. The revelation of Aizen and his band of traitors, the accusations that Inoue-san is among their ranks willingly. The first time you heard someone utter that you'd kicked so much ass the next person who even _considered_ that disparaging thought felt it.

The air is thick with tension as you struggle to maintain hold of your reiatsu the closer he gets to you. You want nothing more than to wail on his ass. You've never thought yourself to be one to hit and ask questions later but suddenly you find yourself understanding Soi Fon a little bit more.

Conversation is starting to wane, everyone seeming to pick up on the growing storm that is your temper. When Renji reaches you, you're moving before you give proper thought to your actions or your audience. Quick as a whip your hand shoots out, the smack to his cheek loud in the now almost silence of the room. "You stupid bastard!" you shout. Now there is complete silence, every eye trained on the two of your, save for those from the fourth who, apparently, are used to this sort of thing.

Your flesh is on fire with fury, tears of anger streaming down your cheeks as you finally let loose. "How could you do that to me?!" You punch his chest, not caring if you make him bleed again.

"I thought you were fucking dead!" Your hands clench into fists and you strike his chest again but there's hardly any strength behind the impact anymore. He reaches for you but you pull back shrieking out, "NO! Don't you _dare_ touch me!" His hands drop to his sides.

"Hey, _-chan," Ichigo's says, his tone a mix between concern and firmness. He's trying to get you to calm down. Tch, fat fucking chance!

"Stay out of this Kurosaki!" you shout turning your fierce countenance on him momentarily. "Tend to your own affairs, like actually making sure Inoue-san is fucking ok!" you shout and he winces.

You can feel yourself unraveling, all the tension of the past weeks erupting in a blind furious rage. Ever since Aizen turned fucking turn coat and Momo a zombie of her former self after recovering from her attempted murder _all_ of the responsibilities of the fifth division have fallen into your lap as its third seat.

It's been you comforting crying shinigami over their bastard of a former captain betraying them, betraying all of you. It's been you handling whatever paperwork happen to manage to make it to your desk. It's been you, worried literally sick about your boyfriend who neglected to mention he was leaving on a _forbidden_ mission to save your mutual friend.

Oh yeah, you're ripped, raring and ready to go. You feel like you could take on Kenpachi with all the suppressed anger you've caged.

Only instead of punching and kicking you're screaming and crying, becoming hysterical really. Because the _one_ person you needed the most when all the shit hit the fan took off without even leaving a note. You'd had to hear through the gossip mongers what had happened to him as well as several other of your friends and fellow shinigami.

Turning your gaze back to Renji you see his eyes filled with guilt and remorse and if you look close enough you swear there are tears threatening to fall. " _Serves you damn well right,"_ you think viciously. You don't recognize yourself but you also can't seem to stop. So you don't, you continue ranting.

"I could have helped!" you yell at him, "Inoue-san is _my_ friend too! I would have gone, willingly, if you'd only told me! But no! You had to go off in the middle of the fucking night and not even tell me where you were going!"

He takes another step towards you and this time you don't retreat. You're not going to back down, not now, not until you've had your say. As he takes one more step you choke out through your tears, "Why Renji? Why didn't you take me with you?" Another flash of anger spikes through your chest. "Is because you think I'm weak? That I would just get in the way? Who needs another woman on the mission or some shit like that? Well, let me tell you something! I am not weak! I didn't become third seat by default you asshole, I fucking earned it!"

Apparently he's reached his fill because he grabs you roughly by the shoulders. "That's not it at all! It's because I fucking love you and I didn't want to risk you getting killed!" he shouts and you stop, staring at him. It's his first time saying he loves you and it's while you're fighting, in front of who knows how many people. Just…perfect.

Your eyes narrow but before you can say another word he's speaking again, "And before you continue on and on about how strong you are, I already know it. In fact I know you're stronger than me!"

Those words send your train of thought on a permanent derailment. Is he seriously _mocking_ you right now? He sees your frown and steps closer, closing some of the distance between your bodies.

Taking a deep breath and speaking more gently he says, "You're stronger here," he taps your head, "and here," he adds placing a hand on your chest over where your heart is still thundering against your ribs.

He sighs. "I have no doubt you would have kicked major arrancar ass but you have to understand _-chan," he draws you closer his breath ghosting over your face, "if you were there, there is no way I could have done what I needed to do. Because all my focus would have been on keeping you safe, whether you needed me to or not. Because I can't live without you, so please," he inhales deeply closing his eyes and leaning his forehead against yours, "please forgive me for leaving and making you worry."

Your own eyes close and you swear to yourself if you cry again you're kicking your own ass. Enough is enough. Leaning up you press your lips to Renji's and feel him start in surprise before he kisses you back. It's a gentle, simple kiss but it holds so much depth. When you part it feels as if the whole room lets out a collective sigh of relief. The storm has passed on.

Looking up into his smudge covered face you whisper, "I love you too, but if you ever pull a stunt like that again I will kill you myself, got it?"

He chuckles but nods. As you embrace the world around you seems to start again. People are talking amongst themselves and you're sure this little scene will be repeated ad nauseam but it's no less than you deserve for acting out like that.

Pulling back you take Renji's hand. "Come on, let's get you home so you can shower and change. I'll make you some taiyaki since I'm sure you're starving. But," and you raise one finger in front of you, "this discussion isn't over. We need to set some ground rules and agreements. This is a partnership Abarai, have a little faith in me."

He pulls you close again and kisses your temple. "I never doubted you, I doubted myself."

You pat his cheek looking in his eyes. "Then we need to work on your confidence honey, because you're amazing."

He smiles fully for the first time since arriving home and you feel the cracks in your heart start to heal. There is so much to be done and so many more hardships coming but you know you can face them all because you're by each other's side and have each other's backs.


End file.
